On names and Italian restaurant patrons

While trying to convince a colleague to accept some paperwork without proposed changes, I quoted Shakespeare's famous line "What's in a name? that which we call a rose, By any other name would smell as sweet." She laughed and said that she would still have to have changes reflected.

This reminded me of a dinner at an Italian restaurant a few months ago where a patron from an adjacent party began reciting Sonnet 116 while we were waiting for our entrees. It was so random, yet so perfect. My dinner date and I applauded when he had finished. It is, after all, one of my favorites among his work.

Shakespeare's Sonnet 116
Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

A quote from earlier tonight

"People the world over have always been more impressed by the power of our example than by the example of our power." - Bill Clinton

Questions unanswered

Our first night in the South, my family and I opted to have dinner at a highly-rated restaurant located a block away from the hotel. When ordering, I asked the waiter which dessert in the pre fixe menu was less fattening. He looked at me and said something similar to the following. "Ma'am, have you seen the guy who owns this place? He basically ate himself cripple. We use one hundred pounds of butter every day at this place, so I don't think there is an answer to your question." In shock, I opted for the bread pudding and immediately thought of all the exercise it would take to burn off the many MANY calories.

In light of my brother's being newly married

"When I was single, I decided I wouldn't marry a man unless I could be proud if we had a son who turned out exactly like him." - Maggie Mason

Reading that two months ago, made me think and think and think some more.

Early morning pillow talk

me: I had the most disgusting nightmare.
jie: What happened?
me: An ugly married guy that I knew kept asking me to go out with him.
jie: That's not a dream. That is every day at work for me.
me: Oh, that's horrible.

Can a person's favorite color be clear?

Thoughts? Anyone?

On weddings and capitalism

Planning for the upcoming nuptials has made my entire family edgy. My brother, the groom to be and steadfast peacemaker of the bunch, snapped at me Thursday morning even after I told him I was having chest pains. He apologized a day later.

I really do not understand why weddings have become such grandiose events. In any other instance, do people host large gatherings, spending considerable sums of money, to mark the beginning of years of hard work and compromise? Is it really that special to have "found someone?"

I wonder then if the wedding tradition has been entirely over taken by an elaborate marketing scheme designed and refined by the best and brightest of this capitalist society. Rather, perhaps these grand scale celebrations are a result of young women's last stitch efforts to have one final party all about them. Really, the speculation could continue forever. And as with most things, I suppose it is likely a combination of many factors.

A majority of this phenomenon is likely to be driven by a need to keep up (or perhaps even outrun) the Joneses. And capitalism would fail to be capitalistic if companies neglected to fill a demand in the market.

Even so, I am really at my wits end with this process. As much as I would like to sit on my high horse and forever swear off grand celebrations with 350 of my bestest friends, I cannot say with absolute confidence that I too will not fall victim to the sensation. Honestly, I believe I am a bit too cynical and a lot too practical for fairy tale weddings. And maybe, just maybe, this is why there is so many ruffled feathers the week before my brother's tri-city "I Do's."

Bullshit

"Religion easily has the best bullshit story of all time. Think about it. Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man ... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of 10 specific things he doesn't want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money." - George Carlin

Stuff

"Actually this is just a place for my stuff, ya know? That's all, a little place for my stuff. That's all I want, that's all you need in life, is a little place for your stuff, ya know? I can see it on your table, everybody's got a little place for their stuff. This is my stuff, that's your stuff, that'll be his stuff over there. That's all you need in life, a little place for your stuff. That's all your house is: a place to keep your stuff. If you didn't have so much stuff, you wouldn't need a house. You could just walk around all the time. A house is just a pile of stuff with a cover on it. You can see that when you're taking off in an airplane. You look down, you see everybody's got a little pile of stuff. All the little piles of stuff. And when you leave your house, you gotta lock it up. Wouldn't want somebody to come by and take some of your stuff. They always take the good stuff. They never bother with that crap you're saving. All they want is the shiny stuff. That's what your house is, a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get . . . more stuff! Sometimes you gotta move, gotta get a bigger house. Why? No room for your stuff anymore." - George Carlin

Switching gears

The construction should be finished as of 5 pm today. The remainder of the week will likely be filled with some much needed cleaning.

There still remains numerous details that have yet to be finalized with the Los Angeles reception--cakes to be tasted, floral arrangements to be approved, wedding favors to be designed. It is probably a good thing we are only expecting some 70 people to attend.

For now though, my main objectives for the next ten days are first to tan my legs and second to tone my arms. It is unfortunate that much of the grooming that will ensue prior to next Wednesday will feel like more of a chore than a treat. I always grow resentful before special occasions because it becomes very apparent that it takes much more effort for women to look presentable.

Many people have been inquiring about who I will bring to the reception. I usually tell them that no one has asked to be my escort. I suppose these people forget that I am more Chinese than not, and that bringing a date would definitely mean something. I will admit that there is a man who is dear to my heart, but I fail to feel compelled to share any part of the matter with the other 70 people participating in the celebration.

For now, I am down shifting to fourth, accelerating towards that finish line, all by myself.

Must love sisters

So frustrated by my sister's lack of a significant other, one of her best girlfriends purchased a six month subscription to eHarmony.com on her behalf this past week. My reaction: "Oh my goodness, I am not the only one who feels this way."

Since 2003, when she ended her relationship with her then most awesome-est boyfriend of 2.5 years, my sister has been consistently short-term dating a lieu of guys with one thing in common--bad for her.

EHarmony only deems suitable about 75% of their matching services applicants. Payment alone is not enough. So, I quickly inquired "Have you filled out the surveys? You know, they reject people." She replied "Really? I am already talking to 11 different guys."

So, here it is. My sister, my very beloved sister, is at last acquainting with men who might be good for her. I am most happy.

And since I suppose this blog with its readership of three, one of whom is the aforementioned most awesome-est (ex)boyfriend, is as good a place as any to advertise my own sister, here is my pitch: sister of 5'7" 125 lbs. 27 years-old Chinese American heart-of-gold female attorney seeks male companion for said sister. Must be good to her and for her. Picture for picture.

My name is Chi-Ling and I approve of this message. ;)

overwhelming

A house remodel, job promotion, brother's wedding details, Los Angeles reception and LSAT preparation--all while living out of my car in the past three months.

And now, insomniac nights.

argument against the man

While tackling some logical reasoning questions the other night, I somehow strayed off into consideration of ad hominem tu quoque arguments. One tangent led to many more and I soon found myself applying the concept to hypocritical statements. My mind started spinning.

All of a sudden writing people off was unsound. The implications of this application on my views toward substance usage and child rearing seemed to me refreshing. And then it hit me, what this all might make of my stance on organized religion and its followers' actions.

For a single moment, my world seemed to stop.